Archive for February, 2007

Little Words to Live By
A person with no patience gains nothing except self frustration

By:M.L. Lai

Chinese New Year this year has been really different for me. I’ve gotten pretty much used to the fact that I’m nudged by my elderly when I answer “No marriage plans anytime soon”. So, whats different this year ? I’ve been given yet another opportunity to appreciate my life. To not take things, events, people, my life for granted.

On the last day of the “Doggy” year, as the Chinese prepare themselves ushering to the year of the “Golden pig”, I nearly celebrated mine either in the police station charged with murder or the nearest emergency ward begging for my dear life.

It was a sunny afternoon after lunch, I was cruising my way back home. As I was driving on the main street, a car came out from a junction and crashed into my 4 wheels. My car brushed itself up a road divider and crashed into a motorcycle. Fortunately, the motorcyclist managed to jump off his 2 wheels before my giant wheels rolled over its small wheelers. Count my blessings, I surely did. I survived and I didn’t kill anyone in the process. Unfortunately my car took the hit for me badly.

What’s the blessing in disguise ? My car insurance was expiring in a week’s time before the horrid accident. If it did expired on me, I would have a severe burn in my pocket. I also realised that the current car insurance policy I had did not include a towing service. Now, what an idiot I am !

Lesson learnt very well. The past week I hunted for a new car insurance. I made endless calls, compared rates and benefits. I got tired, very tired. I sat down in front of my computer and googled “Insurance Online”. Hoping to find something useful. Something useful I found indeed -

Insurance Portal Online offers quotes for life, vehicles and homeowners. My curiosity drove me to view the vehicles quotes. The steps to find a suited company was as simple as ABC. Few clicks on forms and I have more than 10 companies to choose from. Only problem, one rather major problem. I can barely afford them as it was quoted in USD and I doubt any insurance agent would spend a long distance call on me. The insurance policies offered are only valid in USA. Although I was very, very tempted to fill in the form and challenge its customer service motto “An agent will contact you within 48 hours”.

Nevertheless, the idea of an online centralised insurance portal was brilliant. The throbbing experience on endless phone calls and follow up with the agents, just to gather an understanding on the policy offers is just, time consuming. The life insurance quoting engine is spectacular. I remember 6 years back when I first bought my life insurance, it took me 3 months to find one I was comfortable with. Why, oh why is the insurance portal online service not available in Malaysia? Someone should just invest in this opportunity.

So, I sorted my car insurance renewal with my nearby pal. Couldn’t compare much the quotes received but what the heck I bought it anyway. Albeit, I have a good idea on life insurance policy in USA – in fact I must admit I had fun manipulating with its quote engine !

Little Words to Live By
If you don’t change your beliefs, your life will be like this forever. Is that good news?

By: Douglas Noel Adams

“Aiyo, be it the last year I’m giving this to you. Next year, you better start giving it yourself!”

The above remarks may sound too familiar to my fellow single friends. My fellow unmarried friends reaching the near big 30 of age. Welcome to the mid 20s crisis. Yes, it’s a crisis being mid 20 and still receiving ang paus.

A scene resembles a picture in your mind, your aunties and uncles start giving out sinister remarks as they generously hand out the red packet. I wonder what ever happen to the good ‘ol days when you get a pat on your head and a nice, warm greetings “Study hard and grow up to be beautiful”. Oh, I forgot, these wishful kind words are only spoken to only children/teens aged 5 – 18 years old.

The greetings changed it course when you hit age 19 – 23. At 19 year old, I remember oh so clearly the agenda to get the little blessings in disguise was to answer a simple Yes/No question. “Do you have a boyfriend?” I would usually smile and nod, just to indeed please them.

I have grown to be a really something. “My boyfriend queue list is as long as the “China Town” night market. I kid you not, the above phrase is an actual “local” Chinese proverb. Of course, I would never say such remarks, it is usually spoken by the next seated auntie who conveniently overhears your conversation.

It has been the fifth receiving year, I answer to the endless question “When are you getting married?” Standing at age 28 years old, I think I have another 2 years before the well wishes changes its course again. At 30, I could envision myself while still receiving the red packets with a bright, chirpy smile comes yet a warm greeting, “Aiyo, still not married yet, wait for the last ship to sail, you’ll end up being an old maid !”

Wrinkled perhaps, definitely not old !

When is your turn? The agony of answering such witty question is very much like attending a wedding – Be Wed or Be Not Married Yet.

I have an undying urge to reciprocate the same question at funerals. I once read this joke, to stop your elderly from annoyingly asking you that question, you should do the same at funerals. Honestly, I think it will work really well to shut them up but its just darn cruel. So yet again, I escaped such question with a smile. An innocent, naive, sweet smile.

My blessed money this year has been fruitful to date. I am very fortunate. Till next year, here’s wishing my fellow mid 20s Chinese unmarried friends, “Go get the little red packets. There’s nothing to be ashamed of, that you are still receiving them”.

It’s good to give, it’s better receiving!!

Little Words to Live By
Friends are those rare people who ask how you are and then wait for the answer.

By: Unknown

It’s the time of the year where I brace my face, anchor it with shields and ungracefully tear my dignity apart to greet my elder relatives “Gong Xi Fa Cai!”. Why do I proclaim my dignity that low ? Well, it’s merely to maintain the tradition of receiving red packets, known as “ang pau“. These aren’t just red packets. Its packets filled with money. Some generous ringgit I must say received by some lucky ones while there are still a handful receiving the miserable Rm2 in a gigantic red packet.

The tradition of giving out red packets in the Chinese society indicates a blessing from the elders to the young ones. It is also a sign of good fortune, wealth, health and prosperity. Only the married ones are allowed to give out such blessings to the younger generation. As for me, I take this opportunity to weigh my standing position in my companion’s parents. This is a very simple test; works well for the unmarried Chinese couple. A little secret, a devious experiment on my ang pau collection. I will reveal it all now.

If you are constantly worried about what your future in-laws think of you, fret, no less. No more trivial question to your better half “Do you think your parents like me ?”
You can pretty much gauge your value in the opposing family with the ang pau money received from them. If you received less money than the blessing received from his/her own parents; you are deem still an outsider in the family. On the other hand, if you have received more or the same amount as your companion, my hearty congratulations to you; you are part of the family.
As ridicule as this test may seem, I believe this simple test has its significance. People say, “action speaks louder than words”. In this case in point, I say “money speaks louder than words”.
Wanna know who’s the “boss” of the family you need to kiss ass with ? Well, stay tune for my next crackling “wisdom”.

Little Words to Live By
Anger is the feeling that makes your mouth work faster than your mind

By: Evan Esar

Little Words to Live By
Don’t get mad, just get even
Works especially well, when you’re married

By: Nicole Ho

I have 3 legs
My body is scented,
I am covered with flowers but I’m not popular with bees and butterflies
Sometimes I sing
I carry an umbrella all the time
What am I ?

NOTE: Answer revealed next week! Stay tune …